A Letter from the Dog

Dear Addison,

I am okay with the fact that you have officially renamed me. In fact, I think "Mo-Mo" is a cute nickname. I love to hear all of the toddlers in the neighborhood shout "Mo-Mo" at me every time they see me. I am also okay with the fact that you would like to play ball with me from time to time. And, I love the way you share your "leftovers" with me when you are finished eating. I would, however, like to discuss a few "other" things with you... 1 -- Dogs do not wear shoes. Not even cute little pink crocs. Please stop trying to put them on me. After all, you have a hard enough time putting them on yourself (especially on the right feet)!
2 -- I do not like to play dress up. Not your pjs, not your shirts, not your shorts, NADA!

3 -- Dogs do NOT like to talk on cell phones. Please stop pulling my ears and trying to make me talk on the phone.

4 -- I prefer to eat my food out of the bowl -- not off of the floor where you like to throw it. Also, I would appreciate it if you wouldn't put your dirty little hands (and most recently, your dirty little feet) in my water bowl. I understand that you find this terribly amusing, but I do not see the humor...
5 -- Although I have an eye for fashion, I do not like to wear your sunglasses. Please stop chasing me around the house with them.

6 -- I admit that I like to sleep. A LOT. But I do not need to be "plugged in" and "recharged." I will recharge on my own, little one. Save the chargers for the laptops and cell phones please! 7 -- Speaking of sleep, why don't you like to sleep very much anymore? 6 am is just a little too early, don't you think?

8 -- Wet noses are good when you are a dog. Please stop trying to wipe my nose with the tissues.
9 -- I do not enjoy it when you chase me around the house trying to "dry" me off with the kitchen towels. I am not a bull, but I might be forced to "charge" you if you continue to taunt me with the towels.
10-- Dogs. do. not. wear. hats!
I am thrilled (really, I am) that you love me so much, but please, for the sake of my sanity (or what's left of it), do not continue to "love" (torture) me on a daily basis. If the "love" continues, I am afraid I will be left no choice but to escape the next time the door opens!



Love (if you want to call it that),

"Momo"
Your favorite four legged friend

P.S. Did I mention that I really LOVE it when you share your leftovers with me?